“I have faith in you!” Getting Rid of a Child’s Poor Self-Esteem

Low self-esteem is a common development in children with ADHD and learning difficulties who are constantly chastised and punished. They start to feel that they are not intelligent or talented enough. Naturally, we are aware that is untrue. Here are some tips for encouraging your child to identify her own abilities and develop inner confidence.

It might be challenging to correlate self-esteem with ADHD at times, particularly in young children. Everything is a little bit easier for kids and their parents when they are confident in themselves. However, low self-esteem is a major issue for kids with ADHD, and it is a far worse issue for the roughly 50% of kids with ADHD who also struggle academically.

Children require two things in order to feel good about themselves: the assurance that they are intellectually and socially successful, as well as their parents’ unwavering love. A youngster will find it difficult to build self-esteem if one or both of these ingredients are absent.

A young person expressing dissatisfaction may say things like “I detest my life,” “No one likes me,” or “I am just dumb.”

Does your child act or speak in a way that suggests he does not think he is “good enough” or deserving of love? Does her conduct or words indicate that she feels inadequate in her academic pursuits? that she is not particularly liked by her peers or that she does not succeed socially in general? Here are some typical symptoms to look out for, along with remedies.


Adverse Responses?

Consider the previous few weeks. When your child misbehaved, did you or your partner ever become so irate that you yelled at him or said anything you later regretted? Did you or your partner ever make an effort to avoid your child?

If this is the case, have a conversation with your partner about the reasons behind your inability to be composed and loving. Is your child receiving the right treatment for ADHD if his hyperactivity, inattention, or impulsive behaviors are the cause?

Should her struggles with homework and subpar academic achievement be the cause, might she be suffering from untreated learning disabilities? You must take into account the effect your child’s ADHD behaviors are having on his self-esteem if they are making you, other family members, or other kids respond negatively to him.

The Story of Brian

I used to work with Brian, who was eight years old. It was obvious that he needed to take ADHD medicine, but his parents were hesitant to give it to him all day. I put Brian on a medication schedule that would only cover him at school at their urging.

Brian’s parents told me that he was doing much better at school when we next met two weeks later. However, I found out there were serious issues at home. Brian’s parents were always scolding at him to stop doing things like jumping on the furniture, disrupting, and not moving at mealtimes. Brian’s parents promptly consented to extend prescription coverage for weekends and evenings after I advised them to think about the potential impact that Brian’s ranting might be having on his self-esteem.


Success in the Classroom

Think about the events occurring at school. Find out why if your child is falling behind and feels inadequate in the school. Speak with his instructor. Is he finding it difficult to focus, sit still, and engage completely in class? If so, it is possible that he is taking the incorrect ADHD medicine, or the correct drug but at the incorrect dosage or schedule. (If your child’s teachers label him as impulsive, hyperactive, or distractible, his ADHD medication is most likely not being administered correctly.)

Make sure the teacher knows about ADHD for your child. Tell her how minor concessions can assist, and ask her to report back to you on any negative effects your child may be experiencing. Maybe all your child needs are more watchfulness when they are doing unstructured activities like walking in the hallway or playing during recess. Perhaps all he needs is a little assistance getting back on track when he nods off in class.

Even if she can sit still and pay attention in class, does your child have difficulty with reading, writing, or math? Take into account the chance that she has a learning handicap.


The Value of Companions

Consider what you can do to increase your child’s acceptance among her peers while you strive to support her academic success. Watch her with them in organized sports, during structured activities, and during unstructured play. Find out from his teacher how he acts on the playground and in the classroom.

Keep an eye on your youngster when he invites friends over or plays outside (aim to blend in). Is he too timid and afraid to make a fun playmate? Is he overly stern or overly reserved? Does she find it difficult to read the body language of other kids? Is she too impulsive, hyperactive, or easily distracted to play? Is his lack of hand-eye coordination or motor skills the reason he stays away from sports? Does she find it difficult to comprehend the strategy and regulations of team sports? when playing board games?

Once you are aware of the particular social issues that your child is facing, start looking for answers. Perhaps a modified medication schedule or group treatment for social skills is what he needs. Perhaps she might attempt a sport that does not need the same degree of hand-eye coordination or fine motor abilities.

Or perhaps you can discover a non-sporting activity he likes to do.

Increasing a child’s self-esteem is a difficult task. However, your child should start to feel better about himself if you can love him unconditionally and if you are ready to look into certain school and peer issues. Wishing you luck! I can assure you that your child will value the work you have put in.


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